Am I a bad parent because I say no to my kids? I know that is a question a lot of parents ask themselves. I know I do. Sometimes I feel guilty for saying no to my kids. To be honest, at the end of the day you are going to make the decision you feel is best. Sometimes you have to tell your kids no for many reasons: you don’t have the funds to take them somewhere, you feel the situation is unsafe, you don’t feel like your child has been acting right to be rewarded, etc. There are many reasons, but you as a parent are making that that decision and children need to understand and respect the decision.
My husband and I raise our children to know their manners, respect adults, speak when spoken to, and to be grateful for what you are given. I will NOT raise my children to EXPECT things from my husband and I. They will also not just let them think they always get a toy from the store because they were good. We don’t reward our children because they were able to act like civil humans walking through the grocery store. No! They are expected to act civil and walk through the grocery store while we shop.
I Don’t Want My Children To Hate Me
Some moms say, “I don’t want my children to hate me!” Well I don’t want that either, but I am not going to live in fear that if I tell my child no they are going to hate me forever. I am not supposed to be their friend, I am supposed to be a mother that teaches them good and to be successful in life. My kids need to know that their mom is the safe zone and that I am here to listen, but I am also here to teach you. Just because I tell them no doesn’t mean I am not going to be there for them when they need me. Do not feel like your kids aren’t going to trust you or hate you because you told them no.
Don’t You Want To See Your Child Successful?
I want to make sure that they grow up successful and are given the tools they will need in life to succeed. I don’t want to disappointment my children, but I am also not going to lie to my children just to get out of the store alive with out a meltdown by promising them if they are good that I will buy them a toy. That I am not going to do. What I am going to do is teach my kids to trust me. To trust that I will get them what they need from the store to replenish their bodies to have the energy to get through their school day. We will provide our children with a home full of love and support. We will teach our child to be strong and independent. These are all great traits for your children or child to learn to be successful.
Show your child how to pay for groceries, not how to spend unnecessary money on a toy. Teach your child how to pump gas into your car, not buy that candy bar they want at the gas station. Get your child involved with you because at the end of the day our kids like to just be around us. Do this and they will want to accomplish things as well too.
Make Memories & Love Your Children
A lot of people think that the only way to make memories is to go on a lavish trip (which that is making memories I am not saying it’s not), but you most definitely can make a memory out of anything you do with you kids. Make it fun and exciting and they will enjoy just being around you. Sometimes I just like staying home and snuggling up with the kids and my husband and watching a movie. Make it fun and instead of just having regular popcorn with your movie, make puppy chow. They are many ways to make things fun.
Our kids asked to go to the beach this summer and we had to tell them no. It is just not in the cards right now. But, we had a lot of fun going to the Good Guy Show this summer here in town and the kids had so much fun seeing all the old cars, the races, and of course the food. They also got to have fun at summer camp this summer and different field trips they got to go on.
As you can see from the pictures I have posted, our kids are happy and are still loving life. We don’t always say yes, but at the end of the day, they are still living a great life. Most importantly they love being around their parents. So saying no is okay and they will survive and so will you!